The Beginning of the End

Tuesday, 21 days to go

I still have not gotten the call for the "slam dunk" job in my same job title. I email my favorite person in HR about this and she informs me that "there was already an offer on the table for that position. I guess I didn't get back to you."

I will now relay the rest of the conversation as I experienced it in my head:

What came out of my mouth: "Uh, uh."
What was in My head: "WTF?"

Mouth: "You did get back to me. You called me and specifically told me there was no offer and the department head would be calling me. Remember the part where I said, 'that's great news'?'"
Head: "Are %$&#ing kidding me, you idiot?"

Mouth:"What happened?"
Head: "Fix this you cretin!"

HR person: "The department head didn't know there was an offer outstanding."

Mouth: "Wow, that's not good."
Head: "How, by all that's holy did that happen? I am surrounded by incompetence! No, I'm surrounded by idiots - who have jobs! OMG, are you irritated that I'm angry? How dare you! YOU DON"T GET TO BE IRRITATED! I, on the other hand, I get to be catatonic!"

Now, the length of that last inner voice might be the reason people say I'm a little distracted these days with a vacant look in my eyes. I don't know, could be.